The prompt from gelsey was Improvise, to be written in the interconnecting realm of my character Kaylee. She ran away with the idea and I can't believe I wrote this. Please note, this conversation, about Kaylee rather than including Kaylee, precedes what would be a fairly raunchy sex scene. If you don't like suggestive language, don't read it.
Warning: Suggestive language, multiple partners
Word Count: 971
Summary: Since she's depressed over the recent divorced from her second husband, the High King is throwing a birthday bash to cheer Kaylee up, and invited a lot of her old friends. A few old 'friends' decide another step is needed to really cheer her up.
“She looks miserable,” Captain Jack Sparrow said, looking across the dance floor to where the guest of honor was smoozing members of the Fae High Court.
“That's a fairly common state of affairs lately,” Captain Jack Harkness pointed out. “Though given the High King not only insisted on throwing her a birthday party but invited all her friends from other dimensions,you'd think she'd be a little happy today.”
“The ones that are still alive,” Methos said sarcastically, taking a big gulp from his mug of beer. “Most women don't appreciate being reminded yearly of their advancing age.”
“Kaylee stopped counting centuries ago,” Jack Sparrow said, chuckling.
“He has a point,” Jack Harkness agreed. “After long enough, it's the centuries that register, not the individual years. We're celebrating her. So why isn't she happier?”
“Because her husband of a century and a half, father of six of her children, just divorced her out of the blue?” Methos suggested.
“Seven,” Jack Sparrow said.
“What?” Methos asked.
“Seven children,” Jack Sparrow replied. “Six births, but the last one was twin girls.” He gestured to his right where two identical young women were flirting with a collection of young men. The dresses they wore were as high quality as any other woman in the room, but the colors that streaked their face proclaimed them Labyrinthin Fae, and the light-sabers at their waists all but shouted their matrilineage.
“That only makes it worse,” Methos said. “Let me guess, he waited until the day the twins turned one hundred.”
“The day after,” Jack Sparrow said darkly.
“Fine, so she's depressed, and from the sound of it hasn't been laid in far too long. So let's cheer her up,” Jack Harkness suggested.
“What does her having gotten laid lately have anything to do with it?” Methos asked, more than a little perturbed.
The two Jacks turned to each other before turning a pair of far too similar smirks on Methos.
“Correct me if I'm wrong, but we are here are all well aware of Kaylee's sex drive,” Jack Sparrow said. Jack Harkness nodded right away, but it took a moment to get any sort of affirmative from a suddenly stoic Methos. “In my experience, most Fae are fairly sensual creatures...”
Methos coughed derisively and asked, “And just how many of them have you slept with?”
Jack Sparrow grinned lasciviously and replied, “I've been to court a few times, and many a lady seemed quite keen to spend some time behind the curtains.” He gestured at the curtained alcoves that ringed much of the room.
This time Methos' cough sounded rather derogatory, but both Jacks ignored it.
“So, best guess, how long has dear Kaylee been repressing herself?” Jack Harkness asked.
“Who says she has?” Methos asked. “Even if her husband was an ass, there were other options.” He gestured at the men he stood with, then half the room.
“She insisted on being faithful,” Jack Sparrow said derisively. “A side effect of marrying a Spanish Catholic the first time, I think.” He snorted and took a sip of his rum. “Best guess, fifty to a hundred years.”
“Since the twins were conceived?” Jack Harkness asked, horrified.
“That would be a hundred and two years ago,” Jack Sparrow pointed out, correcting for the Fae gestational period. “But I think they bedded since, just not much and not recently.”
“We must rectify this at once,” Jack Harkness said. “That poor woman.”
Methos looked disgusted. “So you think the answer to everything is to drag Kaylee behind one of these curtains and give her a good shagging?”
“Might remind her there is something to live for,” Jack Sparrow suggested dryly.
“Sex?” Methos asked sarcastically.
“And us,” Jack Harkness said. “She married the idiot soon after retiring from the council. I bet she's struggling to find a place for herself in the universe. It was as his wife, raising the kids, but now...”
“She should travel again,” Methos offered.
“She does,” Jack Sparrow said. “Does her duty to Jedi in three dimensions. Supposedly that's half the reason he dumped her. But she doesn't know how to do anything other than her duty these days.”
“And one good fuck is going to fix that?” Methos asked blandly, his continued disbelief blatant.
“No,” Jack Harkness said, grinning wickedly. “But it will remind her there's some good in the world, and some good company.”
“I don't believe you don't miss her,” Jack Sparrow said suggestively.
“You do?” Methos asked defensively.
“Hell yes,” Jack Sparrow said, and Jack Harkness nodded in agreement. “There's a lot of women out there, but few with her experience, flexibility, repertoire, or inventiveness.” Both Jacks had dreamy looks in their eyes for a moment before they focused their attentions back in Methos.
“Point,” Methos conceded. “She is rather ... creative.”
They stood in silence for several minutes looking over the crowd, drinking their drinks and contemplating the options. It was Methos who finally broke the silence.
“So what, we taking turns all night? Assigning hours?”
“Who said anything about taking turns?” Jack Harkness said, eying Methos up and down.
“I don't do orgies,” Methos said darkly, glaring back.
“How do you feel about voyeurism then?” Jack Sparrow suggested, leering at Jack Harkness.
Methos sighed. “Which alcove?”
“Over there,” Jack Sparrow suggested, pointing to a blue curtain in the middle of a section of solid blue curtains. “We'll be behind the purple one.”
“There isn't a purple one there,” Methos said.
“How do you think they keep people from going into alcoves that are already occupied, mate?” Jack Sparrow said with a salacious grin.
“Useful bit of magic,” Jack Harkness said, wrapping an arm around Jack Sparrow's shoulders and guiding him towards the collection of empty alcoves. “Don't take too long, or we'll start without you,” he called over his shoulder.